Mickey Mouse To Get A Complete Makeover

POSTED BY , UPDATED ON November 14th, 2019

After a long period of eighty-two years, Disney has agreed to a complete makeover of the world’s most recognizable mascot. Rockstar will debut the new Mickey Mouse in a gritty and violent new video game.

Mickey Mouse debuted in 1928 in an animated short entitled Steamboat Willy. He’s delighted generations of audiences ever since. He’s Disney’s flagship, representing all that is fun, pure, innocent, and American. But this association comes at a price. According to research groups, Mickey is nothing more than a cold, corporate logo. His image identifies a brand that’s in serious need of a boost.

Rockstar developer Jack Rebney says:

“We’re going to rough this mouse up a lot”.

If you watch old cartoons of Mickey, he was a complete jerk. This mouse was literally playing other animals like musical instruments. He was tagging buildings with graffiti, and always on the make for some hot sex with Minnie or other rats  Rebney chuckles. This new Mickey is going to be a real hellraiser. He’s not just going to be mischievous, he’s going to be murderous.

Rebney says:

“He’s not merely going to react to situations, he’s going to create them. He’s aggressive, angry and capable, a very dangerous and volatile combination. He’s the original M&M. But he never loses his sense of humor through all the horror and terror he creates. He’s still a fun-loving cartoon character, even if that fun is insanely psychotic”.

Disney says they heartily approve of the character overhaul. The new mouse will be relevant to a new generation of desensitized kids. The game is still under development and remains untitled as of yet, but the working title is Rodentus Resurrects. Coming this summer.